Star-crossed Lovers of District 12
by mjenney21
Summary: I loved catching fire but was a bit disappointed that Suzanne Collins didn't develop Katniss and Peeta's relationship. So this is my version of what happened but it still follows the same sort of story line. It will have more romance, more drama and more happy times for our 'star-crossed lovers' Katniss and Peeta.
1. Not Real

**Author's Note: This is actually my first ever fanfiction, I have always loved writing stories, but I've never actually done anything with it, so I thought I'd try this. Anyway, please review, I'd love to know what people think of my writing and what I could improve on, I think it would really help me. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own hunger games or any of the characters, they are all Suzanne Collins's.**

**Chapter 1**

I can't believe I had just done that. I feel like such a horrible person. It's not the fact I told Peeta it was all an act, because it was. Well, most of it was. I'm not exactly willing to think which parts were real and which weren't. Doing that means I have to think back over the games, and I know I'm not ready for that. Ever. So that means that any emotion I have for Peeta must be shut down; locked away in box I will never open, stored away in the deepest darkest places of my mind. At least, that's what I tell myself. Any resolve I made just faded away when I told him. It was awful, and I know I'll never forget it…

_Haymitch walked back to the train, and then the door slammed shut. There was silence in the field; I could only hear the rustling of the grass and the wind whipping my hair. Normally, that would calm me, but instead I felt this uneasy silence that made me very uncomfortable. I looked over at Peeta; his features were twisted in a mask of confusion. _

"_What did he mean?" Peeta asks. I sigh deeply. Tell him the truth Katniss. Tell him the truth. _

"_It's the Capitol. They didn't like our stunt with the berries." I blurt out. _

"_What? What are you talking about?" He says. He still doesn't understand. Either he has no idea what's at stake, or he's really stupid. But somehow, I know that Peeta is many things, but stupid is not one of them. Again I repeat my mantra. Tell him the truth._

"_It seemed too rebellious. So Haymitch has been coaching me through the last few days. To make sure that I didn't mess it up."_

"_Coaching you? But not me." He says. I can almost feel the cogs whirring around in his brain, trying desperately to figure out something, but he's blinded. By what, I have no idea._

_I know I have to say something, so I say something stupid about him being smart enough to get it right. Haymitch told me to tell him that, he said it would make things easier, diffuse the tension a little. But it hasn't. If anything, it's made it a million times worse. _

"_I didn't know there was anything to get right," Peeta says slowly. Then I see the truth dawn on him. He looks as though he can't believe what I've done. He rakes a hand through his tousled blonde hair, and I suddenly find myself fascinated with the way the sunlight reflects of it. Wow, that was weird, I think. Stop right there. You promised yourself that any emotion would be shut down. _

"_So, what you're saying is, these last few days, and then I guess…back in the arena…that was just some strategy you two worked out." Before I can stop myself, I blurt out,_

"_No. I mean, I couldn't even talk to him in the arena, could I?"_

"_But you knew what he wanted you to do, didn't you?" He whispers. I bite my lip. I never knew that telling the truth could be so horrible._

"_It was all for the games, how you acted..."I feel terrible, so I say,_

"_Not all of it." I clutch my flowers tightly. Now I'm thinking of them as flowers, rather than weeds. Is that a good thing? _

"_Well, how much was real?" He asks. Oh no, how do I answer this question when I don't even know the answer myself? _

"_No, forget that," I hear him say. I can't help but feel relieved. "I guess the real question is, what's going to be left when we get home?" I stop and think about this. What will be left when we get home? There's only one way to find out._

"_I don't know, the closer we get to District 12, the more confused I get." I say, I know he wants more, a better answer than what I have given him. Unfortunately, it's the best answer I've got. Peeta stands in front of me, his arms crossed, waiting. I can't look into his eyes. I know if I do, I will be filled with shame and guilt. So I don't._

"_Well, let me know when you work it out." He says. I can hear the pain in his voice, and he sharply turns away from me like he's going to walk away, but then he stops and turns back to me. _

"_I guess you won't need these anymore." He says harshly, plucking the flowers out of my hand. I'm so stunned, I can't move, so I just watch as he rips the heads off the flowers and tosses them to the ground. They scatter around my feet, until I'm surrounded by a ring of pink and white flowers. Peeta turns and walks away, wobbling slightly as he tries to control his prosthetic leg. At one point, he stumbles a little and I want to rush and help him, but my pride won't let me. When he's nearly at the train door, he turns and looks at me one last time. My heart nearly shatters at his appearance. He is pale with shock, watery eyes filled with unshed tears. He looks far too skinny from his time in the arena, and his shoulders are slumped with rejection. His whole body sends out one word, hopelessness. Then he gets on the train and the door slams so loud I could probably hear it 3 valleys away. I just stand there, one hand stretched towards the train, the other clutching my skirt…_

I shudder away from the memory. That was about an hour ago. When I'd been able to move again, I'd sunk to the ground and picked up one of the pink flowers. I clutched it in my hand like a lifeline, then stood up and got on the train. I entered the living quaters and Effie was there, touching up her makeup. When she saw me, she stood up and walked over to me, kissing my cheek.

"Hello my little victor!" she smiled at me, and she was bubbling with so much enthusiasm that even I had to smile.

"Are you looking forward to going back to District 12? I know I am! Can you imagine the reception? I simply cannot believe that there has been two victors, which has never happened before so I'm sure that the festivities will be perfect. Nothing but the best for my two victors!" She gushed, putting the emphasis on the fact that we were hers, like we were some sort of possession. I was about to argue with her, but then she asks where Peeta is, and the guilt took over me again. I made some pathetic excuse about him taking a nap or something but she seemed to believe it. Effie began to babble about Peeta and I winning again so I left the room, I could not stand to be in the same room as her. I went back to my bedroom to try and find something to do. For a while, I just sit and stare out of the window, hoping to see the first signs of District 12. However, I don't see anything, just lots of fields. I haven't seen any other districts on this train, but maybe that's the whole point. The Capitol don't want anyone to see the districts. I wonder why.

There is a sharp knock on my door. I jump up, and glance at the clock. I've been sitting here for hours! The knock comes again. I go to the door and open it with a sigh. Effie stands there, in yet another attire. It makes me wonder how many times a day this woman changes her clothes. Effie smiles at me and tells me it's time for dinner. I follow her into the dining cart and sit down in a seat. It's only then I realise how hungry I actually am. A huge plate of roast dinner later, I'm feeling a lot better. Haymitch staggers into the car and flops down in his seat. He's incredibly drunk. Again. I don't know why to be honest, when he has two victors and is going back to his home. He has nothing bad to forget. Still, I have to be grateful to him. He did get me and Peeta out of the arena alive. Still, maybe it would be best if Peeta had died in the arena because then he wouldn't hate me and President Snow wouldn't want to kill me either. I sigh. Life can be so complicated.

"Haymitch, where's Peeta?" I ask him. Haymitch looks away and focuses on his drink. I hope he isn't ignoring me too. Finally he looks up at me.

"Why do ya wanna know?" he asks. I find that quite rude. He looks at me like I've done something terrible, and I haven't. Well, I have, but Haymitch doesn't know this. Does he?

"He's my friend," I say quietly. "We've been through hell and back together. Is it crime to want to know where he is and if he's alright?" Haymitch looks angry now.

"Sweetheart, I think you've lost the right to know if he's okay. He's pretty upset right now, you need to leave him alone. You being there will make this already shitty situation a million times worse, if that's even possible. He'll forget this ever happened in the morning, with all the booze he's had." He slurs. Wait what? Peeta drinking? Oh no.

"What's going on?" Effie asks. She is sitting across from us, listening intently to our conversation. Sometimes, I forget how observant Effie can be. I pretty much always assume she is doing something frivolous such as changing her hairstyle a million times a day. I always seem to underestimate her. I just don't like it when she says what she sees.

"Effie, this is none of your business, so butt out!" I snap. She looks at me, and I can see the hurt in her eyes. This makes me feel bad. She was only trying to help, and I was rude to her. I'll be sure to add her to the growing list of names of people I have upset today.

"Haymitch," I say trying to keep my voice down. " How much has Peeta had to drink?" This could be disastrous. As far as I'm aware, Peeta has never had alcohol, and if he's had a lot, that could be seriously bad for his body. He can't get wrecked like Haymitch!

"Haymitch, think!" I yell at him. I'm furious with him for letting Peeta get drunk. Any respect for him is long gone.

"Well… we had a few pints, some wine, a few shots, not that much." He grins at me, and I nearly gag at the smell of his breath. I have to find him, to know if Peeta's okay. This is all my fault, god knows what could happen. Quickly I stand up from my chair, and run out of the room. I can hear Haymitch shouting behind me, but I pay no attention, and I know he will be in no condition to follow me. Suddenly, the train starts off again, and the movement throws me back into the wall. I guess they must have finally fixed the problem. I hit my head on something hard and metallic, and I fall to the floor. I instantly get up again, even though my head hurts like hell. I gently touch the bump, and my hand comes back red with blood.

"Dammit," I curse, but I know I have to carry on now. I have to find Peeta, to know if he's alright! A few minutes later, I come across the sleeping quarters. I rush past all the doors, to the 5th one down. I push against the silver door, but the stupid thing won't open. I twist the handle, but it still won't open. Then I notice the passcode on the wall and realise I don't know the code. I'll never get in! Then I have an idea. What if I use my passcode? It might work! I punch the code in as fast as I can, and the door opens. Finally! Then I scan the room, and I let out a gasp when I see Peeta and the state he's in…

**Author's Note: Cliffhanger! Don't worry, I'll try and write more if people like this story. Please remember to review, I can't say enough how much it would mean to me.**

**Love,**

**mjenney21 xxx**


	2. Consequences

Author's Note: Hello! I've finally put up my new chapter, I want to say a massive thank you to anyone who has reviewed, followed or favourite my story! Hope you enjoy and please remember to leave a review so I know how I'm doing xx

Disclaimer: I don't own anything of the Hunger Games. They are all the invention of Suzanne Collins.

_I punch the code in as fast as I can, and the door opens. Finally! Then I scan the room, and I let out a gasp when I see Peeta and the state he's in…_

Chapter 2

Peeta is curled up on the floor, groaning in pain. He has vomit all over his face and clothes, and his hair sticks to his forehead in sweaty clumps. He looks even worse than he did when I found him by the river and that was bad. At least, in the arena, he didn't deliberately try to hurt himself! He's gone through all this pain for me, this horrible self-inflicted torture, and all I have done is thrown it back in his face. Seeing this just makes me think what a truly horrible person I am. But I know this is something I can put right. Gently, I reach over and touch his shoulder, one place that isn't coated in vomit.

"Peeta?" I ask. For a few seconds, I think he isn't going to respond, but then his eyes open and he glances at me before he groans again.

"Peeta, I'm gonna sort you out. You'll be okay, just calm down and let me help you." He nods a little, which I presume means he will let me. I sit back on my heels and think about how exactly I could do that. In the arena, he could at least walk; I think if I tried to move him now then he'd get worse. It amazes me how he managed to back to his compartment. That boy's willpower is astonishing. Then I get an idea. The first thing I do is grab all the remaining bottles and tip them down the sink. I gag as the foul smell reaches my nose and burns my throat. How does anyone drink this and enjoy it? I have no idea. After pouring every drop away, I drop the bottles into the bin. I hear them smash as they land. Every time the bottles smash, I feel relief, knowing that Peeta can't drink them anymore. In the other room, I hear Peeta's moans, and I can tell he is getting worse. I hurry back to him, and he looks like he is about to pass out. I realise that I can't do this alone, I'll need some help to even get him into the bathroom. I kneel down beside him and kiss his sweaty forehead.

"Stay here Peeta. I'm going to get some help. I just need you to hang on for a few minutes but then I'll be back and everything will be sorted out. Promise?" He nods, and opens his mouth as if to say something but no words come out. He's in too much pain to even speak. I can feel tears spring up in my eyes, and I have to leave the room so no-one will see my tears.

Once again, I'm running through the halls, only this time wiping away hot tears that stream down my face. Even though my vision is blurry, I somehow still know what I'm doing and know exactly where to go. I'm heading to Cinna's studio, I don't trust anyone else on this train, and I know Cinna will help without word getting out to the media. We have enough to deal with without them sticking their noses in. I find it so unfair that Peeta and I are the only thing anyone wants to know about these days. I know we won the Hunger Games, and I suppose that is sort of a big deal, but I had no idea that it was so stressful being in front of cameras! I burst into Cinna's studio, where fortunately I find him, nose deep in sketchbooks. He shuts the sketchbook quickly as I come in, and jumps up. I frown a little, wondering what he has in those sketchbooks that he can't show me. However, I don't have much time to think it over before he asks,

"Katniss? What's the matter? "Why are you crying?"

"Cinna, you have to help me," I tell him. "Peeta's not well and I don't know what to do and…" I trail off, after running out of things to say. I'm panting like I've run a marathon, which is sort of strange for me because normally I can deal with sprinting for much longer without getting out of breath. Cinna walks over to me, and his puts his hands on my shoulders. Him being near me calms me down instantly. He is such a good friend, and I don't know what I would do without him.

"Don't worry Katniss, everything will be okay. I'll call some avoxes; they help us sort it out. And before you ask, I won't say a word." I feel so grateful. I'm sure the avoxes have had to deal with Haymitch many times, so I'm pretty sure they will be able to handle Peeta. Cinna requests two avoxes to go to Peeta's room and we head there. I'm dreading seeing Peeta like that again. Once was bad enough, I'm not sure I could handle a second time. When we get back Peeta is constantly making faint groans, and he looks like he is struggling to breathe. I'm not sure what Cinna's reaction was to the situation, he seemed very calm and had a blank emotion on his face. We sit down in the chairs, breathing shallowly so that the putrid stench doesn't burn as much, and wait for the avoxes to arrive.

We wait what seems like forever before the avoxes finally arrive. I notice one of them is the girl who was assigned to my floor just before I went to the Games. She smiles at me, and I return it. Cinna tells the avoxes what they have to do, and they quickly agree to help us. I feel bad, they probably have tasks to do and will be punished for not doing them, but they so readily agree to help me, to help us. Its times like these that remind me that avoxes were traitors at some point, and they also probably hate the Capitol even more for stopping their ability to speak. Between the four of us, we manage to drag Peeta into the bathroom. We sit him down on the toilet seat, and I lay a hand on his shoulder to steady him. The bathroom is very crowded, with 5 people and almost a thousand products on the shelves. Now, I need to do this myself. I needed some people to help me carry him, but now I reckon I should be fine. I tell everyone that they can leave now, and I thank them for helping. To be nicer still, in case they need it, I write notes explaining why the avoxes haven't been working this afternoon. They look at me with gratitude and squeeze my hands, slipping the notes into their pockets. Then they leave and I turn my attention back to Peeta. I assess him silently, wondering what my mother would do in these circumstances. I wish I could call her, I know she would be a massive help.

"Katniss?" I hear a quiet voice behind me. I jump as I realise Cinna never left. I turn to face him, and I can see him studying me.

"Will you be alright on your own?" He asks.

"I think I will be okay." I reply. "I'll manage." And I will, I tell myself silently. This whole scenario is completely my fault. I hurt Peeta. I made him want to forget so he drank all that alcohol. I made him pass out. I made him sick. Realising all this makes me want to cry again. God Katniss, what's with all the crying? I think. This is not normal behaviour for me. I come back to the present and realise that I had let a few tears escape and Cinna is staring at me with a frown on his face.

"Well, if you're sure…" He trails off. "I'll be in my studio if you need me." He touches my shoulder then leaves. I breathe a sigh of relief. As much as I like Cinna, I need to be alone. I need to look after Peeta.

Right, onto the next stage of my plan. I remember my mother telling me one of the best ways to let the alcohol leave the body is to sleep it off. But since Peeta is in a complete mess, covered in vomit and god knows what else, I need to clean him up. I turn to the huge bath in the corner of the room. It's a huge square shape, tiled with teal hexagons. At the side, there is a waterproof control panel that allows the bath to cater for any type of bath you wish. I turn on the taps, and steam instantly fills the room. Now comes the difficult bit. Well, it's not really difficult, just more awkward. Peeta needs to wash, but I can't leave him alone. Which means…I'm going to have to take a bath with Peeta. I kneel besides him, and stroke his hair.

"It's going to be alright Peeta, I promise." Gently, I undo the buttons on his shirt and I thank god that he's wearing a button shirt. I pull the shirt off him, and throw it straight into the bin next to the toilet. Normally, I would never throw away clothes, but in this case, I don't think the clothes can be saved. They are too dirty.

"Peeta?" I ask him. He opens one eye but as he does, I can see him about to pass out again.

"Peeta, you can't pass out again. I just need you to stand up for a few seconds, and then you can sit down again. Think you can do it?" He nods weakly as I stand. I wrap an arm around his waist and pull. Somehow, he manages to stand, even though he is swaying a little. Quickly, I undo the zip, and tug his trousers off his hips. I gulp a little. I am face to face, with Peeta's underwear. I avert my eyes, trying not to stare, even though I really want to. Luckily for me, Peeta can't stand up any longer and he collapses onto the toilet seat again. He leans his head against the wall and sighs. I stand up and turn around so he can't see me and strip down to my underwear. Never have I been so glad for black underwear! I turn around and turn off the water. I help Peeta to stand and we sink into the warm water. I quickly realise that Peeta needs me to support him so we both end up at one end of the bath, with Peeta lying between my legs with his head resting on my chest. I feel this weird sort of comforting intimacy between us and it allows me to relax. I realise that I have never been this close to him, but I like it, and I allow myself to sink back against the edge of the bath. Gently, I wash the vomit off his chest and hair, until he is clean. I don't know what I washed him with, but whatever it was has the most amazing smell. It's manly yet alluring, fragrant and seems to radiate a sense of power and masculinity. I shake my head to clear my thoughts. Why I am thinking like this I don't know. I swear I promised myself to shut down and lock away any emotion. I feel like that box has been ripped open and I've lost the key…

After a few minutes of contemplating this, I decide it's time to get out the bath, so I drain the water, and I wrap huge towels around us both. By the time I've done this, Peeta has nearly fallen asleep. His eyes are drooping and he keeps nodding off. He must be so tired. I help him into bed, and as soon as his head hits the pillow his eyes close. I rummage around in his drawers until I find a t-shirt of his then sit beside him on the bed, wearing nothing but my underwear and his shirt. I'd go get one of my own, but I daren't leave him and anyway, it's comfy. I stroke Peeta's hair to relax him. His eyes open as I realise he hasn't fallen asleep yet.

"Katniss," He whispers. "Thanks…" and then he falls asleep. I smile and kiss his forehead, soothing him into sleep.

Authors Note: I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter! Please review to let me know what you think, I am so grateful to anyone who takes their time to tell me what they think. I'll write the third chapter soon.

Love,

Mjenney21 xxx


	3. Changes

**Author's Note: Hey guys! I've put up my third chapter! I'm really happy that this story is getting really positive reviews, it means so much to me that you guys are enjoying this story, especially as this is my first fanfiction. Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the Hunger Games, everything is the property of Suzanne Collins.**

"_Katniss," he whispers. "Thanks…" and then he falls asleep. I smile and kiss his forehead, soothing him into sleep. _

Chapter 3

I spend all night at Peeta's side. I simply lean against the headboard, tuck my legs under my chin, and watch him. I know it sounds a little creepy, but I get a lot of mixed emotions when I watch Peeta sleep. I feel glad, knowing that he needs a good night. Then I start to feel jealous. How is it that we went through the same ordeal, yet he is not plagued by the nightly terrors that consume me? But underneath it all, I feel this strange sort of comfort knowing that he is not worried about anything, he is completely relaxed and happy. He looks so peaceful when he sleeps, he looks like the boy that I knew from school before the Games. God, so much has changed since then. I've changed since then. I never used to feel so much emotion. I used to be indifferent to many things, but now… now I have seen death at my hand, and have suffered it's consequences, it has made everything real to me. I feel so much grief for all the children who died in the Games, especially Rue. She meant so much to me, she almost felt like a sister. In that arena, she was my Prim. She stopped me becoming a cold-hearted killing machine, as I fear that's what I was becoming. After the tracker-jacker incident, I wanted to kill them all, be ruthless, and then I met Rue. She made me remember who I was, so that I wouldn't become a piece in their games. Rue saved me, and she never even knew it.

Peeta mumbles in his sleep, and turns over so that he is facing me. The action pulls me out of my head, and brings my attention back to him. I can't believe I did that. Tonight, Peeta needs me, and I've let him down. Again. How many more times do I have to do that? I feel so much disgust towards myself, it's unbelievable. I hear the door open, and the avox girl enters, holding a note. It reads,

"_Katniss, get some sleep. I've sent the avox girl to look after Peeta, she will let us know if there's a problem. You have a big day tomorrow, it's important you get your beauty sleep._

_Cinna."_

I frown at the note. There's no way I'm leaving Peeta. I've already let him down so many times, I feel it would be criminal to do it again. I shake my head and press the note back into her hands.

"I'm not leaving him," I tell her. "Please tell Cinna that I don't care about sleep, I have to make sure Peeta's okay." She nods, and swiftly leaves. I wait until I hear the gentle click of the door shutting before I turn back to Peeta. I stroke his hair again and settle back down against the headboard. I didn't realise it until Cinna pointed it out but I really am exhausted. This whole situation has me made me so tired. Without thinking about it, I sink down onto Peeta's pillows. I bury my face into it and sigh happily. I never knew a pillow could smell so good. It smells of freshly baked bread, with a hint of spice and the lingering aroma of alluring aftershave. I snuggle closer to Peeta, and drift off into sleep…

I wake with a start.

"Crap," I mumble. I totally did not mean to do that. I bolt upright, and leap out of the bed. I stumble over to the mirror and internally groan at my appearance. My hair is falling out of its braid, matted and tangled from sleep. My eyes still look tired, and Peeta's shirt is creased and hangs off one shoulder. I roll my eyes at myself. God I really need a shower. I pad into the bathroom and shut the door. I start the shower, peel off my remaining clothes and step into the hot spray. I moan in satisfaction at the feel of the hot pounding water falling down my back. I quickly wash my hair and body then shut off the water. I feel cold as soon as I step onto the matt, but the steam from the room soon warms me up. I grab a warm towel off the rack and dry myself, rubbing it through my hair till it is no longer wet, but damp. Then I'm stuck. I have no clean clothes. I really should have thought about this before I got into the shower. I can't just walk around in a towel, not even when there's no-one around and Peeta's asleep. I sigh and pull my underwear from yesterday on. From some reason I feel really dirty even though the clothes aren't dirty and I slept in the same clothes for weeks in the arena. I spot my jeans curled up in a corner from last night and I put them on along with Peeta's t-shirt. I brush my hair but I don't bother putting it up. Thinking back to earlier how I was wondering how I've changed, this is one of them. At home, I never had my hair down. I find it annoying because it gets in my way when I'm hunting. However, today, I just can't be bothered. I suppose it doesn't really matter but when I look in the mirror I feel different. Then I realise, I am different. I shake my head to clear my head of these thoughts and come out of the bathroom. I go round Peeta's room, cleaning away any evidence of last night's fiasco. Any remaining glass shards, any stains on the carpet, I make sure that no-one could ever know what happened. Then I hear a low growl from my stomach. I lay a hand over it and it growls again like an angry animal caged in a zoo like I saw in the Capitol. Well, I didn't actually see one, but I watched a programme on TV about it. It made me sad, watching all those majestic animals caged up like that. That's the Capitol for you I guess. I check on Peeta and see he is still fast asleep. I smile as I slip on my ballet pumps then I step out of the room, making sure that Peeta's door is firmly closed. Then I head to the dining car with one thing on my mind. Food.

As soon as I sit in my chair a massive plate of steaming food has been set in front of me. I lick my lips happily and dig in. Only when I've finished off the entire plate do I look up. Everyone is there, except Peeta, and they are all staring at me with mixed looks of horror and confusion. There is a massive akward silence but of course, Effie recovers first.

"Katniss!" she exclaims. "A young lady such as yourself should not stuff that amount of food into your mouth. You have to remember that you aren't a starving seam child now, you're a victor, and that means you have to act with grace in dignity!"

"I don't have grace and dignity," I mumble, looking down onto my empty plate. I hear a snort from across the table and look up. It's Haymitch, trying his hardest not to laugh and what looks like to be nursing a massive hangover. Good. Serves him right for getting Peeta drunk.

"Too right." He muses. "If you had to sum Sweetheart here up in a sentence, it wouldn't be grace and dignity. And most definitely, it wouldn't be sweetness and light. Sometimes, I wonder to myself why I call her Sweetheart cos even if she had a heart it wouldn't be sweet."

Now I'm angry. Haymitch can be so rude sometimes, he really doesn't think about what he says to people. I stand up and shout at him,

"Haymitch shut up! You don't know anything about me! Just because I've been in the Hunger Games doesn't mean I've turned into this cruel cold-hearted bitch!" Then Haymitch stands up too and begins to yell at me,

"Really Sweetheart? You expect me to believe you've not changed? Murder changes everyone, how dare you go around saying things like that! And as for you saying, you're not a cruel cold-hearted bitch, well…you are so wrong." I'm absolutely furious by that. I'm about to run around the table to strangle him when I feel a calming hand on my shoulder.

"Calm down Katniss," Cinna says. "There is no point in getting angry. He's drunk and he doesn't know what he's saying." Just hearing his words calms me down, and I sit down again and allow my anger to slowly ebb away. Again, there is another akward silence only this time, no-one really knows what to say. After a few minutes, Cinna asks everyone,

"Where's Peeta? We'll be back in District 12 in a few hours, we need to start prepping him." Before Haymitch opens his massive mouth, I quickly butt in.

"He's asleep. I checked on him before I came down here, and he's fast asleep. I guess he must have just had a long night." Everyone seems to believe my story, and the continue sipping huge cups of what looks like very strong black coffee. Effie has been silent through the whole exchange between Haymitch and I, which is strange but I notice her staring at me a lot. When I look in her direction, she looks away, like she doesn't want to make eye contact with me. Eventually her curiousity gets the best of her.

"Katniss? Are you wearing yesterday's clothes? And that shirt doesn't look like yours."

"No it's not mine. It's Peeta's." The words fly out of my mouth before I can stop them. I clap my hands over my mouth before it can do any more damage. For the second time today, everyone is staring at me.

"It's Peeta's?" Cinna asks. I don't answer. I can feel my face flushing a deep red, and I sink down into my seat, wondering how I can get out of the situation and make everyone forget what just happened. I mean at the table, there's me, Effie, Haymitch, Cinna, Portia, my prep team and Peeta's. That's ten people who just heard me say that. Could my life get any more embarrassing? That's when I hear the deep throaty snigger. After a few seconds Haymitch can't control it any longer.

"Well, at least we know we he's asleep now. He's sure had a long night, obviously. Not real, my arse." I'm blushing even more now. Then I think back to what he just said. _Not real, my arse._ Oh my gosh. Haymitch knows about yesterday. That's it. I've had enough now. I'm getting out of here. I stand and rush out of the room. As I leave I hear a babble of voices behind me. I can hear the prep teams telling each other that they can't wait to dish the gossip back in the Capitol, Effie is exclaiming about how it's simply disgusting and that a young lady shouldn't be have that way. But over it all, I hear Haymitch shouting after me.

"That's it, run away from your troubles like you always do. You can't face the truth. You are a coward Katniss Everdeen!" That's the last thing I hear before I'm out the door and running. To where, I don't know. I just want to be somewhere else, anywhere else other than here.

**Author's Note: There you go guys! Hope you liked it! Just want to say, I hope no-one's offended by the language I use, but it's rated T for a reason. Anyway please leave a review, it really helps me when I get them, anyway I can improve, let me know!**

**Love **

**mjenney21 xxx**


	4. Returning

**Author's Note: Hello to all my lovely readers! How've you all been? I've written my fourth chapter, hope you all enjoy it. Sorry it's taken me so long! Can I just say a massive thanks to everyone who has favourite, followed, reviewed or read this story. You guys have really boosted my confidence as a writer, and I will forever be grateful to you all. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the character's from the Hunger Games. They all belong to Suzanne Collins.**

_That's the last thing I hear before I'm out the door and running. To where, I don't know. I just want to be somewhere else, anywhere else other than here._

Chapter 4

I burst into my bedroom, and collapse on the bed. I feel tears pricking my eyes but I wipe them away furiously. I will not cry, and allow Haymitch the pleasure in knowing he's upset me. I realise I should probably check on Peeta again but I can't stand the embarrassment. God, it was horrible! I tell myself to calm down, hope that they'll forget it soon enough. I thank god for the fact that we will be arriving back in district 12 soon. But that presents its own set of problems. I can't just sit here and figure it out in my head. It won't make sense to me because my thoughts will jumble into one another. I have a tendency to do that. I decide to write my thoughts down, so I head over to my desk and dig out some paper and a pen.

_My mother._

_I know I had a str_a_ined relationship with her before the games. After my experiences, I know that life is precious, and even though she abandoned me and Prim when we needed her most, she is still important to me. She's my mum, and I love her, however forced it may be. I resolve to be more involved in my mother's life, and let her into mine. _

_Our house in the Seam._

_Now I'm a Victor, I'll have to move out to the Victor's Village. I don't exactly want to move there, it feels wrong. However, my mother and Prim deserve better, so I'll move for their sakes. _

_Gale._

Wait, what? Why did I write Gale down? I have no problem with Gale. I must be going insane! I get up from the desk and crumple the piece of paper up until it is a tight ball curled into my fist. In a panic, I rush to the window and open it, throwing the paper out of the train. There, it's gone. I don't ever have to think of it ever again.

I sink down onto the bed and begin twiddling my thumbs, thinking of something to do. I look over at the mirror, and I see I'm still wearing my dirty clothes and Peeta's t-shirt. I decide, just to pass the time, I'm going to look for some clothes. I know, me thinking about clothes? But I'm bored and it'll pass the time. I pick up the tablet at the side of my bed and tap a few buttons. Within seconds, calming folk music fills the room. It makes me smile and I think of home. I can't wait! I've missed it so much. Just the thought of the bustling hob, the market square on a warm summer's day, the miners whistling their way to work fills me with so much pride and happiness. Thinking about this makes District 12 seem like a nice place to live, if you forget about the poverty and the fear. After pressing a few more buttons I find a catalogue that shows me what clothes I've got in my closet. I'd go and look through it myself but it's far too big and complicated for me to understand. For once in my life, I'll allow Capitol technology to help me. After a few minutes spent flipping through I decide on a pair of black leggings, a forest-green sweater and some brown leather hunter's boots. It tells me exactly where to find them, and I change in the wardrobe. I brush my hair until it's free of its tangles, and look in the mirror. I'm pretty proud of the results. I actually look nice. At home, I couldn't care less about clothes or fashion or any of that girly stuff. I don't know what it is, I just have this feeling that I need to look nice. I pick up the dirty clothes off the floor and fold them up and place them on my bed. But I can't bring myself to leave Peeta's shirt. I don't know what it is; I just can't bring myself to leave it. So I dig out my small bag that contained small items from the Capitol I wanted to take home with me. As you can imagine, there wasn't much. It was just a silk scarf for my mother, some new hair ribbons for Prim and some chocolate. I pick the shirt up and bring it to my nose. The scent instantly calms me. It's so…words can't describe it. The shirt smells of freshly baked goods, tinged with Peeta's natural scent. It's so relaxing. I guess I'm used to the smell because even in the arena he constantly smelt like this, despite being covered in blood and mud and god knows what else. I smile a little then stuff the t-shirt into the very bottom of the bag.

Just then, I hear a knock at the door. I head to the other side of the room and open it, fixing a fake smile on my face for whoever's behind the door. Cinna stands there, looking a little awkward.

"Hello Katniss just came to say that we will be in District 12 in two hours so you need to get ready. The prep team will be here in five minutes, then I'll come in with you're out fit. Portia and I figured that you shouldn't be in very fancy dress, you need to show the people that you are a Victor, but you can still relate to them." He says, then looks my up and down, a look of disbelief on his face. I can feel myself begin to flush scarlet. Is my outfit really that bad?

"Actually, what you're wearing will be perfect," he says. "I was thinking of dressing you in a jumper anyway…" He muses. Wow. I picked an outfit that Cinna liked and would dress me in himself? His creative mind must be rubbing off on me! Then the prep team rush into my room, nearly trampling Cinna in their haste to get into the room.

"It's been five minutes!" Octavia says excitedly.

"You promised we would only have to wait five minutes Cinna!" Flavius adds. Venia is standing among them, smiling but rolling her eyes a little at her team mate's excitement.

"Calm down guys." She tells them. "Katniss was not going to disappear in the few minutes we had to wait!" Then she tugs my arm towards the bathroom.

"Come on honey, we have one hour to prepare you and it's not nearly long enough!" I sigh inwardly. A whole hour I'm going to have to sit perfectly still and listen to their chatter. I look over at Cinna, who still has a slight smile on his face. He mouths 'good luck' at me. I smile in return before I'm in the bathroom. I'm sat down at the chair by the dresser, while Octavia rummages through cupboards searching for certain products. I hear her mumbling to herself that they've run out of Capitol Factor Foundation, and that as soon as she gets back she must order some more. Flavius is laying out what looks like torture instruments, but I know they're to be used in my hair. Venia is studying my nails, and searching through her case for the perfect shade of nail varnish that will go with my jumper. Then all of a sudden, it's like a lightbulb goes off in their head, and they converge on me and start their work.

What feels like half an hour later, but is probably only 10 minutes, I don't even recognise my face. Apparently it's necessary to make my face disappear, but then repaint it to look like a more beautiful me. I roll my eyes. That's so typical of the Capitol. Still, I don't complain. I know my prep team and Cinna do make me appeal to the crowd. They make me beautiful. They make me out to be this strong inspiration to everyone in Panem. I'm not really. I'm just an average seventeen year old girl who has just been thrown into this mess and doesn't know how to escape. The prep team chatter away about their lives in the Capitol, about the latest fashion trends and some celebrity there called Catrina Cartier. She's supposedly the most famous woman in Panem. Well, I've never heard of her. I bet she's just one of the fake Capitol women, probably surgically altered to almost unrecognisable. They discuss her latest film; it's expected to be the biggest film of this year. It comes out in a few months I think when Peeta and I will be on the Victory tour. Oh god. That thought scares me. I shake it away. I shouldn't be thinking like that. I should be focused on my victory, on home, on the thoughts of my little sister hugging me tight.

"Katniss…" Octavia asks, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "This morning, when you were wearing Peeta's shirt, did you stay with him last night?" Oh god. I can't tell the truth and I daren't lie. But then I remember about Haymitch's words about making people believe our story. Chances are they'll be interviewed and they'll be able to dish the gossip. Then people will have to believe our story. They'll think it's more real because we're away from the cameras. This moment could be the make or break of everything.

"Katniss?" Octavia prompts. I blink and realise I've been lost in thought. Venia frowns.

"Leave the girl alone Octavia. I guess there are just too many good memories." She smiles. I turn to Octavia and grab her wrist.

"No, I'm happy to answer. You were right Venia; there are too many good memories. I know I can trust you guys though. You are very important and special friends to me," I lie. Flavius gives a little squeak at the thought of being my friend. I know they're all thinking I slept with Peeta, and I need to set them on the right track without telling too much of the truth.

"We didn't want to be alone. We need each other, I always feel better when he's around. But we didn't do any more than sleep, I promise. It was just so nice, being wrapped up in his arms." Their smiles grow so wide, I think their faces will split any minute.

"Aww that's so cute!" Octavia exclaims. "No wonder people love you, it's impossible not to!" Then she gets serious. "Thank you for telling me that Katniss, I feel very grateful and honoured to be your friend." There's real sincerity in her voice as she squeezes my hand gratefully. I gulp a little. She trusted me and I lied to her. To all of them. But it's important; a voice in my head reminds me. It's necessary. Eventually, the prep team step away from me and lead me into the bedroom.

"We're finished!" They chime. I look at myself in the mirror. I look like how I was in the chariot ride. Recognisable, but more beautiful. My lips are painted a pale pink; a light blush litters my cheeks. As usual, my mockingjay pin is pinned to my scarf. They've enhanced my looks to compliment my outfit; it could not be more perfect. They smile and leave as Cinna enters.

"Beautiful," he smiles. "Now go out there and show them what you are made of girl on fire." I'm just about to leave when I spot the bag lying on my bed. I pick it up and give it to Cinna. I know I can trust him.

"Can you please make sure this is sent to my house in Victor's Village? It has some important gifts in there." Cinna nods.

"See you later," I hear him say as I leave the room. I head towards the front train compartment. A few people are there. As I enter the compartment, Effie sends a huge smile my way. She explains the schedule for the day, as I nod but don't take any of it in. I'm staring outside the window as we are in woods. The woods that surround District 12. I know in this high speed train, we will be there in about ten minutes, maybe less. I look around the room. Haymitch is there, looking a hell of a lot more sober than he did a few hours ago. He has a clean shaven appearance, but I know that won't last. At the first opportunity he will get wasted. I head over to the door and stand beside it looking out of the window for the first sight of home. I hear a noise beside me and notice Peeta is now stood next to me. From the first glance at him, you would never have imagined that he was in such a state last night.

"Hello Katniss," he whispers, an embarrassed look on his face.

"Hello Peeta." I replied. He keeps opening and shutting his mouth, like he wants to say something, but he is struggling to get the words out.

"Thank you…" He mumbles.

"For what?" I ask. I'm a bit confused as to what he's referring to.

"For looking after me. I'm so ashamed of myself Katniss! It was stupid and irresponsible and I'm sorry you had to see me like that. I promise it won't happen again." Now I understand. But he has nothing to be sorry for and I tell him so.

"It was my fault, you did that to yourself. Do not ever blame yourself." I tell him. I will not budge at this point. I accepted the fact last night, he has to to.

"Katniss, I'm not sure if this happened or not, but did you stay with me last night? I kind of remember something like you stroked my hair? And you…kissed my forehead?" I'm blushing now. He remembers all that? Maybe he wasn't as drunk as I assumed he was. But I know I have to tell him the truth.

"I did," I tell him honestly. "You've helped more times than I can remember; I felt the debt needed to be repaired." He looks hurt and angry now. That hurts, I wanted to make it better but I've just made it worse. Why do I always do that?

"You did all this because you didn't want to owe me? That's wrong Katniss, on so many levels. I thought you did this because you care about my safety, not because you feel you owe me something. After all we've been through, you don't have the slightest bit of respect for me? I can't cope with this. I'll play my part for the camera's Katniss, but other than that I'm so done. You need to think about your actions, and how they hurt other people. Please just leave me alone." He says harshly. I stagger back a little at his words. That comment cut me to the core. I tried to protect him and… I feel terrible. What have I done? Then I hear Effie's voice shouting over everyone,

"30 seconds till we're in District 12! Places everyone!" Peeta shuffles over to me and places his arm around my waist and fixes a smile on his face. I do the same. Then I feel the train stop and the doors slowly slide open.

**Author's Note: And there's the fourth chapter, hope you enjoyed it! Please remember to review, it really helps me to improve on my writing! I know Peeta seems a bit harsh right now, but I promise it won't last. I looked today and I can hardly believe this story has over 850 views! Wow, I literally can't believe it, thank you so so so much! See y'all back in District 12!**

**Love,**

**Mjenney21 xxx**


	5. Close, Yet Still So Far

**Author's Note: Hello! I'm so amazed at the reaction from this story over a thousand views! Wow, words just can't describe how happy it makes me and considering this is my first fanfiction, I'll definitely write another one when I've finished this story. That won't be for a while yet, I know there are loads more chapters to write until I'll get to a point where the story needs to be wrapped up. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, storyline or anything else. They all belong to Suzanne Collins.**

_Then I feel the train stop and the door slowly slides open._

Chapter 5

I'm engulfed with cheers and flashes. It's very overwhelming. Peeta and I haven't even done anything yet, we're still stood in the train doorway but people have this reaction from just seeing us. I feel very awkward and exposed. Why are people reacting this way? I only won the Hunger Games! It's nothing to be proud of, but these people are cheering as if I've run into a burning building and saved twenty children. It's so strange. I look up at Peeta; he's waving and smiling to the crowd. He notices me staring at him and he looks back at me. Looking into his eyes feels like the worst thing in the world. His eyes show a hint of love that is masked by hurt and pain. All I want to do is run away to my home and curl up in a ball. Haymitch was right, I think to myself. I am a coward. Determined to prove him wrong, I stand up on my tiptoes and gently press my lips to Peeta's. He's surprised, and doesn't want to react but he also knows he needs to play his part. He gives in and returns the kiss with passion and fire. Now I'm surprised. I had never anticipated this. My arms wrap around his neck and his fall to my lower back, his fingertips lightly tracing the edge of my sweater. I lose myself and everyone around me and just focus on the feeling of his lips against mine. Around me I can hear the crowd going wild and I know all the photographers will be going insane at having such a perfect camera opportunity. I don't want to stop the kiss. It feels so good, filling me with warmth and happiness. Eventually, Peeta breaks away, his fingertips trailing my face before his arms leave my body and he reaches for my hands instead and he pulls me off the train. I follow him sadly. I miss his warmth already. I look around at the crowd and see them winking and grinning at each other. My face flushes and I grab Peeta's hand tightly but he doesn't grip back, it's like he's trying to detach himself from me as soon as possible. Effie and Haymitch get out of the train and stand away from Peeta and I.

"You have ten minutes for questions." Effie shouts. The reporters then put down their cameras and quickly dig out pens and paper. They all shout questions at once.

"How does it feel to be a Victor?" One shouts.

"You're icons up and down the country, how are you going to manage your newfound fame?" Another yells.

"Are we going to see any big changes in your life?" More chime in. I start to panic. How am I going to answer these questions? Luckily, Peeta steps in and saves the day.

"We're so pleased to be back in District 12, our home. We've no immediate plans as of yet, but if there's anything major, we'll let you know." He winks at the reporters and about all the women in the crowd swoon, which makes me frown a little. "I think at the moment, we're just going to enjoy our time together and celebrate our victory." He brings me closer to him and I find the courage to speak. "We know we will be very happy together," I say. "I'll be pleased to have Peeta all to myself!" I giggle. Laughter ripples through the crowd, followed with winks and jokes. I smile even wider, pleased that I said the right thing. Effie then steps forward and places her hands on our shoulders.

"I'm sorry gentlemen, but we have a schedule to attend to. You'll have another opportunity to speak to our Victors at a later date, for now you'll have to step aside. If you'll excuse us." Haymitch and Effie begin to push their way the crowd.

"Come on Sweetheart," Haymitch says. "You'll see your sister in a minute, just as soon as we get you out of these crowds." Peeta and I make our way through the tiny gap that Effie and Haymitch managed to create. Every time I blink, I see the cameras flash in my eyes. Is it really going to be like that forever? Eventually we break through the crowd.

Near to the entrance of the station, stands our families. As soon as Prim sees me she comes running towards me, her braids flying out behind her.

"Katniss!" She squeals as she attaches herself to my waist and won't let go. I don't ever want her to. Prim is the only person in the world that I'm certain that I love.

"Hello little duck," I say softly, overcome with emotion. My hands come down to stroke her hair, and I have to fight the tears away. My mother stands back, taking in the scene of her two daughters, a look of pride in her eyes. I hold out a hand for her to join the hug. For a second, she looks taken aback, but then she smiles and runs forward too. We sink to the floor, hugging each other, with Prim in the middle, tears running down our faces.

"My girls," My mum whispers, kissing my forehead. "My beautiful girls. After what seems like forever we all break apart, and stand up. Prim smoothes out her blue cotton dress and I stroke her hair again. I look over at Peeta, who just stood and watched the whole scene, and then he turns to his family. It's very awkward watching them. You can see they are trying to act normal, but it clearly isn't working. Even though my father died when I was eleven, and my mum seemed to disappear into thin air, we're still a family. Between us we have a bond that can never be broken. In Peeta's family, it's almost like that bond was never made. Peeta's older brothers tease him and slap him on the back but they are acting like his best friends, they don't show a tiny hint of emotion for their brother. Peeta's father shakes his hand and pulls him into a light hug. You can see the relief, the happiness in his eyes. You can tell he's proud of him. Peeta's mother surprises me most though. She was standing away, but she steps forward with tears in her eyes and she tightly hugs him. I'm amazed; maybe nearly losing her youngest son to the Hunger Games has made her change her outlook on life. Peeta looks surprised but he returns the hug and nestles her head into his shoulder. I know all he's wanted his life was his mother's acceptance, and he must think he's finally earned it after sixteen years. She strokes his hair, and his whole body shakes. She leans in close to his ear and whispers something. He pulls back shocked, and she slaps his face. My hand comes up to my mouth and I stifle a gasp. Everyone is so shocked that they don't do anything. She does it again and again and he just stands there and takes the pain. I can't cope with it and run forward as she is about to hit him and take the slap myself. My cheeks sting and all I can hear is the sound of her hand hitting my face. She stares at me and her eyes flash in rage.

"How dare you get in the way?" She screams. "He deserves it all for kissing you, a Seam slut! He's brought shame upon our family, he is a complete failure! No wonder he's going after Seam sluts, he isn't even a whole man anymore. He deserves nothing but trash, that's all you are!" I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"Don't ever talk about Katniss like that!" Peeta thunders. "She's all the things you never were! You may think it's acceptable to beat me, but it's not acceptable to hit Katniss. She didn't deserve it, if you think I do then that's fine. I don't want you near Katniss ever again." The witch looks stunned, almost like she has been slapped. Good. She deserves it. Peeta then runs off, I see the glimpse of tears on his face. I want to run after him, but I'm not sure if I should. My mother comes up to me and gently touches my shoulder.

"Go after him Katniss; it's the right thing to do. I'll take Prim to Victors Village. We've been moving our things there all morning so we're ready to move in. I'll get dinner ready. Be back for 6:30 okay?" I nod and hug my mum, then run off in the direction and Peeta went.

It doesn't take long to find him. He headed towards the edge of the Seam, near to the meadow. I search everywhere but I can't find him. Then I realise, maybe he doesn't want to be found. I switch in to hunter mode, and manage to track him down. He's curled up in a street corner, behind the coal mines and away from everyone.

"Peeta," I sigh in relief when I see him. Then I hear the sobs and my heart breaks. He looks like a young boy again. I run to him and put my arms around him. He fights against me but I refuse to let him go. Eventually he gives in and his head falls against my chest as he sobs. The weight of him pushes me back so that I'm sitting against the walls with him sobbing. We sit there for about half an hour before he pulls back. I dig a tissue out of my pocket and gently dry his tears.

"Thanks," He whispers.

"Don't believe anything she says," I tell him. "They're all lies." I can't believe she even had the nerve to try anything like that. That woman has a serious issue.

"What she said about you was lies," He replied. "What she said about me was completely true."

"No, Peeta, you can't believe her! You are amazing and kind; don't let her words get to you!"

"She was right," He mutters. "I'm not a real man anymore. I am a failure and brought fame upon my family!" He punches the wall and the old bricks crumble to the floor until he gives up crying again. I feel horrible. What can I do? I try talking to him but he won't listen to me. I grab his face and make him look at me.

"Peeta stop," I tell him. "Listen to me! You are a real man. You always have been and you always will be. Just because you lost your leg doesn't mean that you aren't a man anymore. You are definitely not a failure. You won the Hunger Games for fuck's sake! You defied the odds and came home a Victor, did you hear the cheering outside the train. That was for you. If people thought you were a failure would they have cheered like that? I don't think so. And anyone who says you've brought shame on your family is a goddamn liar. Everyone loves you Peeta. No-one hates you. It's impossible not to." He looks up at me.

"Stop lying to me Katniss. My mother hates me. She's beaten me for years. Would she do that if she loved me? And you hate me. If you cared about me at all you wouldn't have said what you said." I'm shocked into silence.

"I don't hate you," I mumble. "I've never hated you." He looks up at me, almost as if to check that I'm telling the truth. Whatever he sees in his eyes must relay that because the next thing I know, his lips are on mine. The kiss is salty from his tears, and at some point tears fall from my eyes and our tears mingle together, making our lips taste of salt. The kiss is not like the one earlier, which was full of passion and fire, this relays softness and heartache. It sparks something in me, not a fire, but a warm glow that seems to radiate all over my body and warms me from the tips of my toes to my hair. I don't know what the feeling is, but I do know I want to feel it forever. I know this is a feeling I'll store away and think about it later to try and figure out what it means. The kiss seems to last a long time but then Peeta pulls away. He looks ashamed.

"I shouldn't have done that," He says. "I'm sorry. I forgot I'm not in the arena where I can kiss you wherever I like. Here it's different. You have Gale. You two can marry and have children and grow old together. And I'm happy for you. But I had to kiss you for real just once. One last kiss to remember you by. Goodbye Katniss." He stands up and walks away. The sky fills rapidly with grey clouds and rain starts pouring down while I sit on the grass staring in the direction he walked away.

**Author's Note: Hope you enjoyed this chapter! I know I've updated a lot earlier than normal, but I was feeling inspired. Please leave a review, I love getting them! What do you think will happen next? I want you all to be intrigued for the next chapter. See ya!**

**Love,**

**Mjenney21 xxx **


	6. Let Me In

**Author's Note: Hello! I know I updated really quickly last time, but I'm not going to be updating every week. I'll update when I feel inspired, I feel there's no point in writing because I force myself to update. I know if I write when I'm inspired then my chapters will be a lot better. Anyway, enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the Hunger Games, I wish I did though! Everything from the Hunger Games belongs to Suzanne Collins.**

_The sky fills rapidly with grey clouds and rain starts pouring down while I sit on the grass staring in the direction he walked away._

Chapter 6

I felt as if I had been turned to stone. I couldn't move. I could still feel his kiss on my lips. The warm glow from the kiss slowly faded away until I could feel the rain, icy sleets pouring down my neck. Slowly, almost as I was in a dream, I stood up and walked in the direction of Victor's Village. To be honest I don't know how I got home. I just wandered the streets but I never saw any citizens of the District. Maybe it was because of the rain, maybe it's because my mind was just too preoccupied. Eventually, I stumbled through the gates of Victor's Village. It was shaped in a perfect circle with a circle of grass in the middle. The grass was like a magnificent garden filled with all kinds of exotic flowers and plants that I had never seen before. Nine of the houses were dark and unoccupied, they exuberated a sense of power and fear. They scared me. I had never seen such big houses in my life. I'd thought that the mayor's house was large, but these… they were just enormous. They were three stories tall, with stone that was obviously meant to be white but the stone had faded to a light grey from the coal dust. The thought made me smile. Even though I was here by the Capitol's choice, I still had a touch of home surrounding me. I could tell just through walking through here that I was going to hate it. I felt out of the way, away from society. There was only one way in and one way out. There was a road, leading from the town square to the Village. It was intimidating to walk up that long empty road. No wonder no-one came to Victor's Village. I shuddered to myself and focused on the three houses that had some sign of life from them. I could tell straight away which one was Haymitch's. Even though someone had tried, it still had an unkempt untidy appearance. Next to Haymitch's was Peeta's. I could tell because the smell of baking bread seeped through the windows. Even though I was cold, wet and hungry, the smell gave me hope. I trudged onto the next house which I'm assuming was mine. A golden glow radiated from the windows and I smiled at the thought of a hot meal. I walked up the steps, and then opened the door. A wave of heat instantly washed over me. Wow. The thought had never occurred to me that now I would never be cold or be striving to feed my family. I would always have enough. I would never want for anything ever again. My mother must have heard me because she comes running into the hall. She takes in my appearance, speechless. I'd almost forgot it was raining. I must look like a drowned rat that's been dragged through a hedge backwards.

"Katniss!" She exclaims. "What happened to you? It's 9 o'clock!" Is it? Have I really been out for that long? I glance over at a clock conveniently placed on the wall. Oh my god, it is.

"I'm sorry mum," I tell her. Here comes the lie. "Peeta and I had a lot to talk about." She nods, she seems to believe it.

"Poor lad," she mutters. "How horrible for him. Katniss, you weren't out in the rain all that time were you?" Too exhausted to lie any more I nod and pull off my leather boots. She shakes her head and clicks her tongue, but she doesn't scold me. I don't think she sees the point. She ushers me upstairs and into the bathroom.

"Take a shower, and give your wet clothes to me. When you get out, there'll be some supper in your room for you. Go on then!" She says. "Take off your wet clothes!" I just stand there sheepishly. I'm not going to undress for my mother! I haven't done that since I was about nine! I cross my arms across my soggy jumper and shake my head, my hair sending water droplets all over the room. My mother sighs.

"For goodness sake," my mother sighs and steps out of the room. I start the shower running then peel off my wet clothes. I have to say, I feel a lot better about not having soggy woollen jumpers on me. Keeping myself covered, I open the door a crack and shove my clothes through it.

"Thank you," she says, and I hear her go downstairs, presumably to hang my clothes up so they can dry. I sigh to myself. I know I promised myself to try and get along better with my mother, but I never realised just hard that may be. I hadn't thought that maybe the Games would make her tougher, like they did me. I try to ignore the thought. I've been back a few hours, how can I judge her? And she's my _mother._ It shouldn't be like this. She should be soft and gentle, helping me down the treacherous path that is life. Instead she was weak, and I had to walk along that lonely road with no light, no guidance. However, now it's seems she's there to help me but I no longer require her help. I step in the shower, and let my thoughts wash away with the water. By the time I get out of the shower, I feel refreshed but sleepy. I pull a brand new fluffy white towel over my body. I'd never used a towel before the Capitol. I'd just used and old rag and I notice how different my lifestyles are now. Wrapping the towel tightly round my body, making sure everything is covered I step out into the hall. I look around; my soaking hair slapping cold water against my skin gives me goose bumps and makes me shiver. Luckily no-one seems to be in the hallway. I wonder where my room is. Prim comes out of a door and sees me standing awkwardly in the hall.

"Hi Katniss!" She smiles at me, reaching forward with her arms outstretched but then suddenly notices my soaking appearance. "Are you looking for your room?" She asks. "Don't worry, I'll show you," I follow her round the corner, as she's pointing out rooms. She turns a corner and there's a door peeking out. She opens it, and I expect it to be a tiny room but it opens up into one of the biggest rooms I've ever seen.

I instantly like the room. It's large, but has sloping ceilings. In the middle of the room, there's a huge teal rug, and there's a black sofa on top of it. There's a tv screen facing the sofa, with a large bookshelf next to it, filled with books. My closets are hidden in the walls and there's a large bay window that overlooks the woods. I'd had no idea that the woods would surround Victor's Village but when you think about it of course it would, as Victor's Village is away from the town and merchant area. The window has a large seat around it with lots of cushions laid on the seat. It looks like it would be very comfy; I can't wait to try it out. Then I look for a bed but I can't see one. Wait, I thought this was supposed to be a bedroom? Prim sees me looking around and laughs.

"Your beds over here Katniss," She smiles. I follow her and see a hidden hole in the wall that I've never seen before. It's covered with a thick teal curtain and when you part it, there's a huge king size bed with white and black bedding it has an oak chest of drawers beside it covered with a lamp that sends a gentle glow around the room. The lamp is unlike anything I've ever seen before, it has bubbles that are inside and they seem to float up and down the liquid. It's memorising. I finally turn back to Prim a smile on my face.

"I love it," I whisper. "Thank you little duck. It's perfect." Prim's smile becomes so wide she once again looks like a young girl whose wish has just come true.

"I knew you'd like it," she squeals. "I just knew!" She runs forward and hugs me tight, even though I'm still in my towel. I hug her back, but clutch one hand over the top of my towel just in case. I hear a slight knock on the door, and my mother enters holding a pile of freshly laundered clothes.

"Hello girls," She smiles warmly, placing the clothes on my bed. "Here you go Katniss. Come on Primrose, leave your sister alone to change and settle in." She gently takes my sister by the shoulders and steers her out of the room. I let the towel fall from my body and lift the pile of clothes and bring them to my nose. They smell of fresh air, the woods and wildflowers. The smell calms me. I dress quickly, revelling in the feel of warm clothes heating my chilled body. I walk over to the bay window and sit myself down on the cushions, looking at my surroundings. It's dark of course, but I can make out some of the houses and see the vague outline of the woods behind them. I draw my attention to a window in front of me. The light from the room is on but the curtains are drawn shut. I vaguely wonder whose house it is. I tilt my head up, staring up in to the night sky. The sky seems like a giant black velvet blanket, studded with diamonds. It's beautiful. I could look at it all night. I focus my attention, on the brightest, biggest star. I can vaguely remember my father holding me tight, telling me about the star.

"_It's called the Pole star my little kitkat." _He used to say. _"It's the most magical star in the sky. You can see it anywhere in the world. If you miss someone, find the Pole star, chances are that person will be looking at the star too. On your birthday if you wish on it, it'll always come true." _I close my eyes, remembering this powerful memory that has struck a chord with me and will stay with me forever. Every year on my birthday, I used to wish on the star. The year after his death, I wished on it. I wished for my father to come back. Of course it never happened. That's when I stopped believing in wishes and my whole world seemed to crumble down into a bottomless pit of despair. I open my eyes and look at the window again. Peeta's standing there, his hand on the glass looking up at the sky. I wonder if he's looking at the Pole star, the way I was a minute ago. He looks down and our eyes meet. I try to smile at him, but he shakes his head and pushes away from the window, pushing the curtains out of his way and drawing them tightly shut. I let out a little sob.

"Katniss?" I hear a gentle voice call. I come out of the curtains and see my mother at the doorway, a steaming mug of something clasped in her pale slim fingers. "Can I come in?" She asks.

"Of course," I reply, sitting down on my bed, pushing my damp hair out of my eyes. She sets the mug down on the table beside my bed and sits next to me, gently braiding it. We sit in silence.

"What's the matter Katniss?" She asks, her fingers deftly weaving in and out of my hair.

"Nothing," I sigh. She looks hurt for a second, and then determination sets in her features. She stands up and tilts my chin up so I have to look at her.

"Katniss," She begins. "I made a promise to myself when you went to the Games; that I would look after Prim and be there for her, and if you came back I would be a better mother to you. When I left my family to be with your father," her eyes fill with tears at the mention of my father. I think she will retreat into herself but she shakes herself and stands firm. "My family disowned me. So I know how it feels to be lonely, without a guiding hand to help you. So I want to be there for you. But you have got to stop doing this. I want to help you, and I know you want to do it yourself, but you have to let me in. To let me try. It hurts me to know that you let Primrose in so easily, yet every time I try you just shut me out. Look I know I haven't been the best mother to you two. I don't deserve you, I know. But please, let me try, let me help. I want to be there for you. Will you let me do that?" Tears fill my eyes and I hug my mother tightly.

"Yes." I whisper. She smiles; wiping a few tears away, and exits the room, leaving me alone.

**Author's Note: And there's my sixth chapter. I know this one isn't as exciting or action packed as others but I felt it was important to show how Katniss is trying to adapt back to life in District 12. I also wanted to explore how her relationships with others may have changed, so I'm sorry if you were expecting something more action packed. I promise next time, I'll try and add more things happening, maybe involve Haymitch or Gale or Peeta? I'll have a think. Please leave a review they always help me and I love receiving them. See y'all around!**

**Love **

**Mjenney21 xxx**


	7. Nightmares

**Author's Note: Hello, can't believe this story has over 2500 views! I never expected to get that many so thank you. Also I received a review from someone who said that I'm the next Suzanne Collins for them, wow that's such an honour since she is one of my favourite authors. I don't know who wrote this review but whoever did, this chapter is for you! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the Hunger Games.**

_She smiles; wiping a few tears away, and exits the room, leaving me alone. _

Chapter 7

After my mother has left the room, I wander around my bedroom for something to do. I don't want to sleep just yet. I feel tired but I know I won't be able to fall asleep for ages yet. I go over to my bedside table and pick up the mug my mother left for me. I don't know what it is but it's a pale red colour and smells of summer fruits. I sit down at the window seat, clasping my drink in my hands and watch the night go by. I can't remember ever sitting at home and watching the sky after my father died. I think it's because the memories are too strong, too painful for me to handle. I know I don't need to be strong for my family anymore but I feel like I still have to. My mother may have changed for the better during the games, but that doesn't necessarily mean that she won't ever spiral back into depression. I think that's why even when she was better I wouldn't let her take charge because I couldn't rely on her and I certainly couldn't trust her. I sigh, finishing the last of my drink. I feel really tired now. Today has just worn me out. I think back over the day. Running away from everyone at breakfast, getting prepped, Peeta telling me he can't deal with it anymore, the paparazzi, hugging Prim and my mother, the witch hitting Peeta, me running after him and comforting him, the gentle kiss in the rain. I smile at the thought of the kiss. I revel in the memory of his lips moving against mine, that strange sensation that came over my body, the tug of my heartstrings when he left. I open my eyes and find myself standing in front of a mirror, a sleepy dreamy expression on my face. I snap out of it quickly. I thought I agreed to lock away any feelings? What happened to that promise? Life, I think. It can be so unfair. I try to clear my head. I need to think about other things, not simpering around like some stupid, obnoxious, head-over-heels-in-love teenage girl. I dump the cup on my bedside table and get into bed. I lay down, resting my head on a comfortable feather-filled pillow. I close my eyes, and slowly wait for sleep.

_I'm sitting in a tree. I smile because I think I'm sitting in the woods. However, when I look around to take in my surroundings, I realise I'm in my sleeping bag, my leg hanging out of one side. I touch it and nearly scream out loud in pain. My burn has gotten worse, it's bright red and my skin feels like it's on fire. Gritting my teeth, I will myself not to cry out. I realise I need to get out of the tree and go back to the lake I was in earlier. I'm just about undo my belt when I realise the Career Tributes will still be under the tree, waiting to kill me. Carefully, I turn my body a little and search the area surrounding my tree. Mysteriously, they all seem to have disappeared. I want to go, but I can't help feeling like this is a trick. My survival instinct is torn between going back to the lake to nurse myself back to health and the career tributes trying to trick me down from the tree. Either way, I will die. If I don't get something for my leg, it most certainly will get infected. If I stay in the tree, I will starve to death, or the Career tributes will eventually get fed up of waiting and kill me. But if I get down from the tree and find out it's a trap, I'll be killed. However, if I come down, and it's not a trick, I could get away from the corner I appear to have backed myself into. I sigh and realise it's my only option that will not end in my death. I have no choice. Quickly, I pack my supplies, and check my surrounding area five times until I spot the gleam of spears and swords heading away from my tree and back to the Cornucopia. I guess they must have finally run out of supplies or have got bored of waiting for me and have gone to search for other tributes to fall victims to their gleaning swords tainted with blood…Steeling up the courage, I slowly begin crawling down the tree, ready to dash back at a moment's notice. But before I realise it, my boots are placed on hard mud, trampled into the ground by lots of heavy footprints. I stand facing the tree trunk for a minute listening for any signs that the Career's may have appeared. When I'm satisfied that I've managed to outrun them, I smile and run a hand through my matted hair. I turn round, my backpack on my shoulder; ready to run when I'm stopped in my tracks. The Careers are back, and they've circled me so it's impossible to escape, all their weapons pointed straight at me. They all have menacing grins on their faces. Glimmer stands to my left, pointing my bow and arrows at me. Marvel stands next to her, brandishing a sharp-looking spear. Clove and Cato are to my right, Clove holding out her jacket and exposing a menacing selection of knives, Cato wielding a horrible looking sword. Their eyes flash with anticipation of a kill. Oh God, I think to myself. I can't escape, I can't move. I'm going to die. I shut my eyes, waiting for death._

"_Well, well, well, what have we here?" A voice says. My eyes snap open. I know that voice! Peeta pushes through the crowd of Career's, a sword in his hand._

"_Peeta, Please." I beg. "You know me. I'm from your District. You helped me…with the bread!" I say desperately. His eyes flash with hate, and the sword comes up to point at my chest. _

"_Help you?" He says, disgusted. "I gave you that bread not to help you; I threw it in the wrong direction. I was so angry with myself, I hoped you would die!" Tears spring to my eyes. _

"_But…" I whisper. "I thought you loved me!" Peeta scoffs, shaking his head in disbelief. Then he begins to laugh and the other Career's join in. _

"_You honestly thought that I, a merchant would love someone like you? Someone who is ugly, selfish and cruel? My mother was right. You are a bitch. A Seam slut." He smiles as he says the words. I flinch. The words sting and tears fall from my face. For a second Peeta looks like the boy I once knew, and he reaches forward and wipes my tears away. I smile, thinking I've finally gotten away from this nightmare, and lean my face into his hands. His hand disappears and it slaps my face hard. _

"_Whore." He whispers into my ear. He leans away from my face, staring deep into my eyes._

"_Slut. Seam slut." He says louder. The Career's laugh again, taking a tiny step forward. _

"_Kill her." Peeta says to the others, seeming almost bored. He walks away from the group, and leans against a nearby tree to watch my death._

"_Peeta!" I plead, begging him to have mercy on me. He doesn't listen, laughing at my pleas. The Careers step closer, their weapons just beginning to touch me. They chant the horrible words 'Seam slut'. I'm screaming and begging, they are laughing and smiling. As the sword pierces my chest, I close my eyes and let out a blood-curdling scream…_

"Katniss!" My mother shouts. I'm jolted back to reality. I'm sat up in the bed, covered in sweat and my mother is shaking me violently. I burst into tears, and my mother pulls me in close, hugging me like she did when I was a young child.

"Oh Sweetheart," She whispers, rocking me back and forth. My tears don't let up and I look down at my hands to find I'm shaking.

"It was just a dream Katniss, just a dream. You're safe now." She mumbles over and over again. It doesn't help. I force myself to calm down. Crying like this does not help anyone. I pull away from my mother, push my wild hair away from my face and drag a hand over my eyes.

"I'm okay." I say quietly. "I'm alright now." But I'm not. I'm still shaking, my mind still playing the horrible images. All I can hear is the chants of 'Seam slut'. They are right. This makes me want to cry again, but I force myself not to.

"Katniss, do you want a cup of tea?" My mother asks. I nod slowly. Anything to get that nightmare out of my head. My mother stands up and leaves the room and I follow her quickly. I cannot stay in this room. This room that taunts my winning everywhere I look. I hate it. My mother heads through corridors and down stairs, flicking lights on as she goes. For once, I'm glad of this. At my house we'd have to light candles, and when you're hand is shaking, that's not always the best thing to do, as many families found out. We arrive in the kitchen and I slump down at the kitchen table, exhausted. My mother potters about, reaching up for cups and plopping a teabag in each of them. I glance at the clock on the wall. It reads 6 am. I stare at the clock, watching the hands slowly make its way around. I'm dragged out of my trance by my mother setting down a cup in front of me.

"Just the way you like it," She says quietly. "But with extra sugar for the shock." I nod and drink the tea quickly. It burns my tongue, and it's far too sweet, but it's hot and a gentle relief from my nightmare land of tonight.

"Thank you," I acknowledge. My mother smiles.

"It's alright Katniss. Any time." Shyly, I glance up, and our eyes meet across the table. My mother reaches over, and gently clasps my hand. This comfort from her makes me want to cry again. Then the moment is spoiled by a knock on the back door. My mother stands up and heads over to the door. I crane my neck, but I can't see who it is. Who would be knocking at our door at 6 am? I can see my mother's faintly startled expression, but she nods and lets the person in. My heart speeds up a little. Peeta stands in the kitchen, a basket of fresh bread in his arms, his cheeks flushed with the cold air. He walks over and places a basket on the table.

"There you go Mrs Everdeen. I hope these are to your liking." His voice is warm and polite, nothing like the Peeta in my dream. He notices me sitting at the table and smiles a little. He raises an eyebrow at my wild, dragged-through-a-hedge-backwards appearance but says nothing. He's seen worse after all.

"Good morning Katniss." He says. I drag my eyes away from him and focus on my tea.

"Morning." I mutter coldly. I can see out of my eye line that he flinches a little and my mother frowns at me. No doubt confused and disgusted by my lack of manners. He shrugs a little, and turns to talk to my mother again.

"Mrs Everdeen, do you have anything to help me sleep? I've been having…bad dreams." He murmurs, a little embarrassed. My head snaps up. He has nightmares too?

"You have nightmares?" I ask. He nods; his eyes almost seem to ask me if I do too. I nod in answer to his question. My mother watches our exchange, a frown on her face.

"You both are suffering from bad dreams?" She asks. In turn we both describe our dreams, but I can tell Peeta is editing his tale, like I am mine. I know that I cannot tell my family the true extent of my dreams, it would frighten them. My mother listens patiently and when we have finished she talks to herself.

"The dreams surround the events from the games. I wonder if that's due to the traumatic experience that the brain takes the fear from the memories and stores them in the subconscious only to be relayed during sleep and changed into images at the front of the brain…?" I switch off at this point. I've no idea what she is talking about. Perhaps she's read it in a book she's found around the house somewhere. My mother is always searching for cures to help the people. It's one thing that makes me proud about my mother. She is an excellent healer. Everyone would rather go see her than the apothecary healers in the merchant square. I raise an eyebrow a Peeta, silently communicating him. His lips lift in a smile in return. It's strange how we seem to be able to have conversations like this. I look around the room, and realise that my mother has disappeared. Maybe she's gone to wake Prim. Today is Sunday, so she'll be off school. I can hardly believe that now I have to get used to the idea of time. In the Capitol and the games, you don't tend to take notice of time. You only see it as another day.

"Penny for your thoughts?" Peeta asks quietly. I turn my head and see him smiling at me.

"Oh you know, just find it a bit strange, adjusting." My words come out strange, but he seems to grasp my meaning.

"Yeah, I know. I've got that big house all by myself; it's kind of weird not being around my family." His smile wavers a little before it fixes in place.

"Did you're family not want to move in with you?" I ask gently, not wanting to hurt him again.

"Well my Dad did, but my brothers can't be bothered with the walk to town and my mother…well, you can imagine what her reaction was." I nod. I can't believe his family would refuse to live with him. Peeta's been through hell and back, and all they care about is their stupid bakery? Peeta carries on talking.

"I don't know what it is with my mother. She hates me. She sees me as a useless thing. She's beaten me since I was little and it's all I know. My childhood was filled with hate and unhappiness. What's wrong with me? Why doesn't she love me like a mother should?" He asks. My heart fills with sadness for him. He's all alone in the world. Slowly, I reach over and place my hand on his on the table like my mother did earlier.

"Ignore her Peeta, she's not worth it," I begin, when the back door slams open and Gale marches in.

"Catnip, are you ready for hunting? I've been waiting for hours!" He takes in my appearance and frowns. "Why aren't you ready?" Then he sees Peeta, and our hands locked on the table, and his face flushes with anger and his grey eyes flash with hate and jealousy. He looks pretty scary and I flinch from his gaze. Holy shit…

**Author's Note: Soooo that was my next chapter! Filled with drama, I know. Again, I hope no-one is offended with the language I use but when I write, I write what I feel is appropriate for the situation. It's rated what it is for a reason, but if you think the rating needs to go up, please let me know. As always, please leave a review to let me know how I'm doing. See ya! **

**Love,**

**Mjenney21 xxx **


	8. One Step Forward, A Giant Leap Back

**Author's Note: Hello everyone! In a really good mood because my birthday was on 21****st**** . I had a really good day and it left me inspired so I decided to write this! Enjoy and please leave a review xx**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games or any of the characters. It would have made an ace pressie though!**

_Then he sees Peeta, and our hands locked on the table, and his face flushes with anger and his grey eyes flash with hate and jealousy. He looks pretty scary and I flinch with his gaze. Holy shit…_

Chapter 8

My mind has just gone completely blank. I don't know what to say, I feel frozen. Peeta gently unlocks my hand from his and stands up.

"Hello Gale," He smiles politely. "I've heard a lot about you." Peeta holds out his hand for Gale to shake but he just ignores him completely.

"Yeah, I'm sure you have." He mutters rudely, then sits himself down at the table and touches my hand which is still splayed across the table. I pull my hand away quickly. He frowns, and grabs my wrist, really hard. It hurts and I want to yank it free, but I feel trapped, so I give in and let him hold it.

"I thought you were supposed to meet me in the woods?" He says gently, but I sense a menacing undertone to it. "Remember, when you came to me last night?" He smiles and steals a sneaky glance at Peeta out of the corner of his eye. I'm so confused. What is he talking about? I haven't seen Gale since we talked in the Justice Building. I bite my lip.

"What are you talking about?" I stutter nervously. He grips my wrist even tighter. What wrong with him? This isn't the Gale I know. His eyes flash with fire.

"Remember?" He says fiercely. I just nod in agreement.

"Why don't you get ready, and then we can go to the woods. I've been dying to get some alone time with you." He says, with a smile on his face. He releases my wrist and I shakily stand up, and discreetly rub my wrist. I steal a glance at Peeta, he looks indifferent, almost bored. Peeta unpacks the basket of bread he left for my mother and grabs the basket.

"Well, I'd better get back." He says coldly. I gaze at him sadly. How is it that just ten minutes ago, he was sweet and gently reassuring but now seems cold and cruel? He reminds me of the Peeta in my dream.

"Yeah, go on baker boy," Gale mutters under his breath. "No-one wants you here." I can see Peeta's eyes narrow slightly, and I drop my gaze to the floor, disgusted by Gale's lack of manners. I grab a bowl of stew my mother made for me last night. I didn't eat it because I was too late back, but Peeta can have it, as a repayment for the bread. Peeta turns to leave, but I place a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"Peeta," I start. He turns back and faces me. "Here, have this. My mother made it last night." He takes the bowl from me and I can see the gratefulness in his eyes.

"Thanks Katniss." He mutters, squeezing my hands a little. I hear the scrape of the chair across kitchen as Gale stands up. He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me close to him. I squirm out of his grasp but he holds a firm grip on me and it's impossible to escape. What is he doing? And what point is he trying to make?

"Goodbye Katniss, Gale." He nods to us and leaves, the door slamming shut behind him.

"Thank God," Gale mutters. "I thought he was never going to leave!" Finally, I wriggle out of his grasp.

"What the hell Gale?" I shout. "Why did you do that? What are you trying to prove? It's strange and creepy and I don't like it. Peeta has done nothing wrong and you are acting rude and obnoxious. What's your problem?" His eyes flash once more and he pulls away from me and begins pacing the kitchen.

"What's he done wrong? What hasn't he done? How dare he come into your house and talk to you like you are his little thing on the side? You deserve so much better than him!" I'm shocked. For a second, I'm speechless but then my tongue gets the better of me and my words lash out at full force.

"Excuse me? How dare you say he treats me badly, when you are the one who is grabbing my waist and being rude? I can't believe you! You are not the same person I left in the Justice Building." He gasps and flinches like I've just slapped him. I can't bring myself to care, to be honest. I feel like he deserves it. I cross my arms and just stand there, locked in a staring contest across the room. Gale and I are the same. We are both stubborn, with strong will, and neither of us wants to give in. You can feel the tension in the room steadily rising but he is the one to look away.

"You're right Catnip. I'm sorry." He stands in front of me, his stormy grey eyes boring into mine. "Can we go into the woods now? Enough time has been wasted. I need to gather as much game as I can. I start in the mines tomorrow; my family will starve if I don't have a big haul today." I feel a little guilty now. Gale turned eighteen during the Games and I didn't even give it a thought. It's good in a way, he can't be reaped now, but it also means he must work long hours in the terrible mines that killed both our fathers.

"Okay," I finally agree. "Wait here. I'll be ten minutes." I turn away from him and head upstairs. I cross my mother on the stairs.

"What was all the shouting about?" She asks quietly, juggling a large basket of laundry in her arms.

"Don't worry about it mother, it's nothing." I tell her gently, smiling a little. "I'm going hunting with Gale. I'll be back soon." She smiles a little, focusing her gaze on the pile of clothes she's holding.

"Okay, make sure you are back at 9 o'clock because they want to talk you through the schedule for the day. Peeta needs to be here too so make sure you let him know." She says. I groan inwardly. It's not fair. I've not even been back twenty four hours yet and they want to film me already? It's unbelievable. I want to scream and shout and rage but it's not my mother's fault so I force myself to smile gratefully.

"Thank you mother. I'll be sure to let Peeta know." Then I turn away from her and go upstairs to my bedroom. I wander over to the mirror and groan again, only this time at my appearance. I look absolutely awful. What must Peeta have thought? Carefully I study my face. I'm still a little pale from my nightmare, and the remaining beads of sweat stick to my forehead. I turn away from the mirror and dress quickly in some loose fitting beige trousers and a plain black t-shirt. I brush my bird's nest of hair until it is tame, then re-braid it just so it's out of my way. I go into the family bathroom and brush my teeth quickly. I head back downstairs and pull on my father's leather jacket. It's late August, and you can tell that autumn is steadily approaching. In the District, our year is pretty simple. In the early days of the year we celebrate the New Year, then the first day of June is the reaping and over the summer we are all forced to watch the annual Hunger Games. In September we celebrate the harvest festival, one of the only days of the year where everyone in the district is fed. In November, the Victory Tour begins, and we are forced to celebrate our tributes death, but this time, we have to celebrate our victory. The thought makes me shudder. The only thing I am happy about with my victory is parcel day. It happens on the first day in every month, and I am allowed to hand parcels of life to the citizens of the District. My first parcel day will be in a week's time, and even though I hate to be the centre of attention, I am looking forward to seeing the joy of children's faces as I give them their hope. Entering the kitchen, I find Gale near the back door, his face holds a look of longing. You can tell he is dying to go into the woods. For him, these woods are his sanctuary, just like they are mine. Today is his last day of freedom before he has to work in those horrible mines, we need to make the most of it.

"Are we going to the woods or not?" I tease. His head snaps up at the sound of my voice. He seems startled for a minute, but then he opens the door and outstretches his arm.

"After you my lady," He bows for a second and I shove him good naturedly. We head out of the house, and set off towards the woods. Then I remember my mother's words earlier. I need to tell Peeta to be at my house at 9. I stop in the middle of the road, my body already turning back towards Victors Village.

"Wait, I need to go back and talk to Peeta," I tell Gale. "I'll be back in a minute." He closes up instantly, and his brow furrows into a frown.

"Why do you need to talk to _him_?" He asks. "Does he need to know where you are every minute of the day just so he can have a peace of mind?" He snickers nastily.

"Gale!" I warn him, pointing a finger to his chest. "I need to tell him something because my mother told me to. And if you don't like it, you can go away!" Gale rolls his eyes.

"God Catnip, I was only joking!" He smiles, but I don't think he was. "C'mon, we need to get to the woods. You can talk to Bread Boy after!" I cross my arms over my chest stubbornly.

"It can't wait," I tell him. "I have to tell him now!" I turn away from him and head towards Peeta's house. I hear Gale sigh heavily behind me but after a minute follows me. I walk up the steps to Peeta's house and knock quietly. Gale stops at the front gate, he seems not to want to come any further. I roll my eyes when he can't see. What is his problem? After a few seconds, Peeta opens the door and a waft of fresh bread and paint hits my nose. I inhale deeply. Who knew it could smell that nice?

"Katniss?" Peeta asks. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?" He smiles and I return it.

"I came to tell you that you need to be at my house at 9. The cameras will be here then." I see him bite his lip for a moment, and I have to turn away. That affects me in some weird sort of way. Then he smiles a little, and I can relax.

"Okay. Thanks for telling me…" He trails off for a minute, opening and closing his mouth like he wants to say something, but can't. "I'm dreading this." He mutters after a pause. I smile awkwardly. I am too. I hate acting, I just can't do it, and now I must pretend for god knows how long.

"I am too." I say. He looks up at me, and we share a moment of understanding. We both hate this façade we must put on, for the sake of the petty fans in the Capitol. I don't understand why they are so obsessed with us anyway, it's not like we are anything special. Peeta and I just stand there, staring at each other. I notice the way the late summer sun makes his hair shine like gold, his pale skin glowing in the light. I notice the flour stain on his dark trousers, the slight smudge of paint on his t-shirt. _He looks so handsome right now…_I think to myself. Whoa…. That's insane. Peeta's blue eyes watch my carefully, and I feel like he can almost see right through me. I can feel my heart beat faster and my cheeks flushing a little. Peeta reaches out a hand, and pushes away a stray lock of hair from my forehead.

"Thank you." I whisper.

"Anytime." He whispers back.

"Catnip!" Gale yells loudly. I flinch. "Are you coming to the woods or not?" I smile at Peeta sadly, wanting to stay with him.

"I'd better go…" I mumble. Then an idea hits me. "Peeta would you like to come for dinner tonight? I know my mother would love to have you!" He smiles radiantly.

"Of course," He tells me. "I'll go and invite Haymitch too. It would be a good thing for him to socialise." I nod. I haven't seen Haymitch since we got off the train. I feel a little bad for not checking in on him. He did save Peeta's life after all.

"Okay." I smile once more. What is it with all the smiling today? I normally never smile this much.

"Katniss!" Gale hollers. He's mad now, I can tell. You can hear it in his voice, that and the fact he called me Katniss not Catnip. I've always hated that nickname. It sounds stupid but it's no use. I told him once before I didn't like it but he refused to stop, so I've just learned to put up with it. I sigh and speak to Peeta one last time.

"See you at 9," I murmur.

"Goodbye Katniss." He touches my shoulder gently, like you would a wounded animal.

"KATNISS!" Gale shouts so loud you could probably hear it in the Seam. Peeta withdraws his hand quickly and I miss it already. I miss his presence, his warmth that never fails to make me smile.

"Goodbye Peeta." I smile once more and I turn away and head back down the path towards Gale. He stomps towards me and grabs my shoulder roughly.

"Now if you don't mind, I'd actually like to go to the woods today to get some food for my family. Not that you care anymore, now that your family is safe and you are rich as fuck will the rest of the district starve!" I gasp in horror.

"Gale! How dare you!" I shout. "Why do you think you can talk to me like that? Do you have no respect for me? You are disgusting!" Gale laughs.

"Says you! Katniss Everdeen, you've changed. You aren't the Catnip who left me in the Justice Building, the Catnip that cared about her family, about me? Now you are just… heartless, simpering and stupid. It turns out that you really don't care about anyone else, just yourself and _Peeta_." He spits his name like its poison. "He's changed you Katniss, no matter what you or anyone else says. You've turned into…into his whore!" He roars. I shrink back. Gale goes into a full on rant, saying awful things to me and Peeta, about everyone in the District. I stare at him in horror. Who is this man?

"That's enough!" Peeta comes running down the path, standing in between us. "I will not hear you talk that way about a lady! Do you have no shame at all?" He yells. Even though Peeta is about an inch shorter than Gale, he seems to grow at that very moment, towering over him. Gale seems to morph into this hideous creature filled with hate and rage. He lifts his arm to punch Peeta, and I run in between him and Gale, trying to block the punch. I feel the smack of the fist in my face and I fall to the ground.

"Katniss! Peeta gasps, falling to his knees beside me. I look up at Gale a look of horror on his face.

"Catnip, I'm sorry, I wasn't aiming for you! I can't believe you!" He thunders at Peeta.

"Go away," Peeta says calmly, "You've done enough."

"How dare you tell me to go away!" Gale screams. "I'm staying for her." I've had enough. I'm sick of the sight of him.

"Gale, go away." I mumble. Gale is speechless for a second.

"But…Catnip…"He trails off.

"I'm not your Catnip," I say weakly. "I've always hated being called that, and you know it. Now go away!" I close my eyes, and I hear footsteps. I'm guessing that Gale finally has realised it's best to walk away. Peeta picks me up and cradles me into his chest. I snuggle my face against his t-shirt, hoping it can keep away the horrible images that are imprinted into my mind. I open my eyes, and see his face worriedly looking down at me.

"Katniss, are you okay?" Peeta asks. I see it out of the corner of my eye and I don't have time to warn him. Gale comes charging back down the street, roaring like an enraged bull. He punches Peeta full on in the face, and in shock he drops me, and my head hits the floor, my vision is filled with black spots. Gale kicks me in the chest, so hard it knocks my breath away.

"You little slut!" He shouts, then runs away. I hear Peeta gasp my name, and I try to reach for him, to tell him I'm okay but the blackness surrounds me, and I have no choice but to succumb to it…

**Author's Note: Cliff-hanger, again! What's going to happen next? Do you think Katniss will be okay? I found this chapter difficult to write because I don't want to paint Gale as one dimensional, that he's only there to ruin Peeta and Katniss's relationship. I've read so many stories like that, and I hate them, so that's why I was trying to show his nice side when he is alone with Katniss, and his jealous angry side comes out when she's with Peeta. Hope this chapter was okay for you! And remember please leave a review!**

**Love,**

**Mjenney21 xxx**


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